I'm trying to come to the decision on when to stop breast feeding. Or in my case, when to stop expressing. I go back to work in November and always said I would stop expressing by then because we don't have anywhere private at work that I can express during the day and I feel a bit uncomfortable with the idea of expressing at work anyway. Plus, with returning to work I want to spend that quality time with Cohen in the evenings and not be attached to a breast pump. But then I remember the benefits of breast milk and I feel guilty about stopping. Especially since my milk has settled in now and I have a great supply. I just don't know what to do! I was planning to carry on expressing until he is 16 weeks old which would give me a couple of weeks to ease off before returning to work but I don't want to look back and wish I'd made the effort to carry on for longer. There is also the fact that breastfeeding can lower the risk of breast cancer and with my mum having died from breast cancer at the young age of 43, I wonder if I should keep going as long as possible. But then she breastfed me and it made no difference. Decisions, decisions! Do you think the main benefits of breast milk would have been had by 16 weeks? Advice please!
By law your work has to provide a place for you to BF/ express. I would have a talk to them and see if you can work something out. Even if you cut back and only pump before and after work then that is better than nothing. I would continue to do it as long as I could, you can pump descretly these days, and im sure most of your work mates would soon get used to it.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.dol.govt.nz/er/minimumrights/breaks.asp
We have a specific b'feeding room in my company. But its right next to our office, and I would be unbelievably embarassed to head out the door with a noisy pump that Im sure they could hear through paper thin walls!
ReplyDeleteI was successful in b'feeding till 6mths with the combo of formula, and I went back to work when B was 4&half mths. B was b'fed at night, and bottle fed during the day at daycare. Formula is that good in this day and age, that really, I think its a trivial issue these days. Too much pressure on mums. If people judge you over formula, then they obviously had an easier time feeding, when I thought it was the hardest thing overall preg/labour and the works.
Of my friends that b'fed solely till 12mths+, because of all those medical stats, well one child is on a puffer daily, another has been in hospital on oxygen twice in the last month due to asthma, and a third is looking at needing fillings at the tender age of 4. Go figure... Stats can look whatever way you like.
Sorry for the novel. In summary, do what works best for you. xx
The whole breastfeeding issue is so hard! It's so full of expectations and guilt! I never had a full supply, and once I went back to work, it pretty much went away on its own. I loved every minute of it, though!
ReplyDeleteI think, overall, you can never get these early, precious months back. It sounds like pumping is keeping you from having that time with Cohen. It might be good to go ahead and start cutting back now, so you can have as much stress-free baby time with him now as you can.
If it's any consolation, we had to supplement with formula from the start, and Davie is perfectly fine and healthy!
I understand exactly what you're going through...nearly to a T. My LO was four months when I stopped EBF. My choice also had to do with work issues (here's a link to the post I wrote about why http://tinyurl.com/3jo5ywn). I still nurse at night when he wakes up (partially to still give him some bm and partially because it's way easier than making bottle of formula, as his has to still and thicken).
ReplyDeleteIt takes a lot of thought and personal reflection to make this decision. But, what I realize now after looking back...when I was reaching out for opinions and thoughts...I had already made my decision. There was just so much pressure to keep going that I needed to hear that it was okay to do what was best for us.
Be strong and make the decision that makes you the happiest mom. It was will make for a happy baby and a happy(er) transition back to work.
Good luck!
In the long run, breast milk is the best for your baby! If you have the milk supply, keep it up. It will help with bonding, too- your little one will feel close to you via the breast milk, and you can still be with him during pumping sessions at home. Can you pump in your car? Or get a cover at work? Breast milk is liquid gold, and formula is chemicals that can never match up. If you've got it, that's THE best gift you could give to your baby! xoxo
ReplyDeleteI think you need to do what feels right for you. People are so eager to give advice and say what you should and shouldn't be doing. Dont feel guilty about anything, remember there are plenty of babies never breastfed and they are fine. Good Luck
ReplyDeleteI agree with Red Power Ranger. Do what works best for you and Cohen. BF reduces risks for a few condition for the mum and bubs; not totally eliminate them. You have done wonderfully well by expressing all those time. Bub would have got a lot of goodies from you.
ReplyDeleteI went back to work when my son was 6 months old. I expressed as much as I could in the lead up to going back, and froze it in those special sterile freezer bags. I then expressed at work, twice a day to start, dropping back to once a day until he was 12 months, then we went straight to cows milk in a sip cup. We would offer him the defrosted EBM, and freeze the fresh stuff to make sure it was all used up before getting too old.
ReplyDeleteAt first I felt a bit awkward expressing at work, but then I figured that I wasnt going to let the opinion of some random people I work with dictate what I did with my baby. They can be weirded out, or uncomfortable, that wasnt my problem - and I work in a male dominated field. I have my own office though - but no locks on the door! I put a sign up 'Do not disturb' on the door, and took a couple of wedges of wood in, to stick under the door so I felt secure that no-one would barge in.
It was an effort, but in the end I felt it was the best thing for my son. Oh, and the only saving grace was that I had an electric pump - best ever investment. The one I had is an Ameda Purely Yours double pump, and it is a pearler - I could express 250mls or so in half an hour if I had a good let down. Worth its weight in gold!
Good luck with whatever you decide.
I would just like to add that the fact that you are asking could mean that you aren't quite ready. Breastfeeding is such an emotional attachment I found....I came back to work when my baby was 7 months and so only did the morning and evening feeds and weaned him onto formula during the day, by 8 months I had fully weaned him. Sometimes people find they don't have enough milk to do this but by the sounds of it supply hasn't been an issue. You could try doing that, so 1/2 and 1/2 better than nothing. If you feel that you are too tired and your relationship is suffering then give it up then. I regret not carrying on for longer (for reasons similar to yours) but once that milk has gone it's gone you can't get it back unfortunately.
ReplyDeleteBefore I had our baby, I was committed to exclusive breast-feeding and building up a supply of breast milk. Now that the baby is here, I find that it is so easy to just nurse him when I can, and let my husband give him formula when it's his turn to take care of the baby.
ReplyDeleteAs parents, there is so much pressure to do everything possible for our children. But for me, I need to remember to take care of myself also. So I say, choose whatever makes your life easier. You will be a happier mum, and that is the greatest gift that you can give your child.
Hey did you decide what you wanted to know? Sorry I could offer no advice but yes totally agree it is whats best for you...
ReplyDeleteSorry, but come back to re-read the comments. Can I add that the comment by ANGEL is exactly the ones that make it so difficult for mums. Liquid gold? Are we living in the dark ages? That old bonding crap is laughable. Unless you have a background as a clown and can juggle, pumping and holding your baby is quite an amusing suggestion. And now I saw on the news that mums that use cloth nappies bond better with baby? Ha ha ha, Doubt it, they are too busy soaking the poo stained nappies to spend time with the babies.
ReplyDeleteWay too much pressure over trivial crap. You are a good mum Haidee, and whether or not Cohen is fed formula or booby juice, seriously it wont determine if he becomes a Dr or a has the immunity of Superman.
Breast feeding is a beautiful experience! But it doesnt pay the mortgage or clean the house or cook meals in between work shifts!
ReplyDeleteHaidee the best gift you can give Cohen is love and a stress free mummy! An old saying a stress free mummy means a happy bubby, hubby and home!If I had to go back to work I would switch over to FF cuz of leaky boobie fear and privacy issues!
I also dont agree that: Breast milk = liquid gold? I am currently a BF mum with a 10 mth old but had to FF my 2 daughters for medical reasons. Do I love my son more cuz his BF? No absolute rubbish! I loved my kids from the moment I saw those two pink lines on the pregnancy stick!
Haidee Ive followed your story for a long time while I was TTC! Keep yourself happy and healthy and enjoy these moments! As you said he might be your only bub. Dont miss out on the milestones worrying if your not doing everything by the book. Your son is just beautiful!